more nostalgia.

What is it with me thinking about old relationships these days?

Today was one of my childhood best friend's birthday. I have been thinking about her all day. We spent many of our adolescent days pining over our lives and shared so much, part of her is cemented to my personality and make up. It has to be. I laugh and love so much just thinking about her....

We stayed up all night talking on the phone, seriously, I did not sleep for a few years. We drove around Florida going to dance auditions and planning to escape our families (and boring) lives to go to performing arts boarding school (she went, i didn't). We were obsessed with "I Love Lucy" and that was our comic relief. We were (kinda) anti social to others, and found enough friendship in each other. Spent endless weekend nights "sleeping over" which including TPing the boys in the neighborhood wearing black "ninja" clothes and climbing out of her 2 story window with sheets tied together (but we had on our roller blade protective gear in case we fell). We got in trouble for laughing and not being able to stop. We both switched schools so we could attend the same one in which we ate lunch alone (but together) and one of our teachers called us, "the girls from another planet". We liked him and thought everyone else sucked, so this was a compliment.

In my young age, this dear friend saw more vulnerability in me than anyone. We were intense as friends and real. Depressed when sad, manic when happy. A roller coaster ridden, but with each up and down, we were in it together. She taught me a lot. About myself, and friendship, and relationships. I used to think it was weird that we fought. Like major conflicts and hurt. As a young girl, I didn't realize that in relationships, this is a part of it. When you care for someone, you get angry. Life is messy, love is messier, right? Ever heard that the opposite of love is NOT hate, but APATHY? I think that is true. If you piss me off, I still love you, if I don't care, you are fading away....

My husband doesn't know this old friend. Last year, we got to spend time together, Jonathan and I and my friend and her fiance. Enjoying two bottles of wine by Lake Eola, dear friend and I, started where we left off, our guys chiming in sharing stories, adventures and outlooks on life.

When driving home, my husband commented that he couldn't believe how similar we were, my friend and I. Our humor. Our stories. Our personalities.

So, I think about that, how are those that we love imprinted on us?

And, how do WE imprint on those we love?

Happy Birthday dear friend. Thank you for sharing your life with me many years ago.